Hallie stopped taking formal lessons (it's hard to keep paying for something when you know your kid isn't loving it) and I started going through the songs with her on my own. We're moving at a much slower pace but we're making progress. The hard part is she's good. She's got the rhythm and she picks up the songs quickly. I think that's why it's so hard to see her not love it. And she does enjoy it - once she has the song down. It's the process of learning the song (which is a day or two!) that she doesn't enjoy. But she's being a good sport and still going through the books. I keep telling her years from now she'll be sitting at the piano with her daughter who wants to quit and she'll encourage her to keep going. With a smile on her face she replied, "I sure hope I don't do this to my daughter!"
Have you ever listened to the interview with Julie B Beck and her daughter on Mormon channel? She talks about fighting over piano lessons, and they even called it combat piano! Her daughter who hated it the very most ended up sticking with it the longest and I think majored in music in college! You should listen to the interview.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I am not implying you should do what Julie B Beck did! Obviously that's something between you and your daughter. I just thought it was nice to know that someone as amazing as Sister Beck had fights about lessons with her kids.
DeleteThanks for sharing! I'm excited to check it out. I'm always up for inspiration!
DeleteShe didn't beg to play piano and then want to drop it a month later. Why does she have to play cause you wish you had continued? Why don't you take the formal lessons? She did it more than a year. That is hardly dropping it without a sincere effort. Perhaps when she gets older she would like to try a different instrument when that is a choice at school in a few years? But will she be brave enough to ask to play when once you start a lesson you are stuck through high school?
ReplyDeleteAll good questions and things to think about. I think every kid is different and how you push them and teach them differs as well. This child in particular is talented, but a perfectionist. It's hard to be a perfectionist when you're learning new songs every week without getting frustrated. So we've tried different things and what we're doing now seems to be as good of place as we've been. She won't be forced to play until high school. She's probably got another year left before I revaluate and see if she's grown to enjoy it because at that point she'll be able to play more pop/familiar songs to her - the type of music she actually wants to play. I don't believe kids know exactly what they like and dislike at this stage because so much is unfamiliar to them and when things are hard it's easy to say they don't like something. We're giving it a solid try and I'm happy to have her step away if it's just not her thing.
DeleteI think piano is harder to put a time limit on and am glad you are planning to reevaluate from time to time. Most activities take place over several months and then end for a season. It's easy to say we signed you up for soccer and you will finish the season even though you found you didn't like it like you thought. And it's not "quitting", it's the end of the season. And then there are new sports to try out in the off season. One that might stick and that is all that is really important, to get them active doing something enjoyable. Piano is ongoing and similar activities like band and choir do not typically start until older ages. It is hard to stop until another similar activity presents itself as an alternative.
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ReplyDeleteI think that you are right in encouraging her to continue. Every person including myself, that I have talked with about this same issue, regrets quitting. Since you are doing it at a slower pace and trying to help her learn to enjoy it, you are to be commended! Keep it up. When she is a teenager, if she is still against it, maybe then let her switch to something else. The music theory she has learned will help her in other areas as well.
ReplyDeleteThey've owned many instruments but their two current favorites are guitars and this Schoenhut Piano. After raving about having a piano for months I finally approved and I'm so glad here
ReplyDeleteJust stumbled upon your blog and I'm loving it!! I really appreciated seeing this little story. I'm trying to encourage my daughter to continue playing even when it is difficult but nearly all of my acquaintances discourage me from doing this saying, a person either has musical ability or they don't and if it's not coming naturally, it never will. I just can't comprehend this type of thinking. So we should give up on something just because it is a challenge and something we aren't naturally inclined towards? Or, in your daughter's case, perhaps just because we're uninterested or still yet too immature to appreciate? I hope to teach my daughter to appreciate the joy of accomplishing something through hard work and dedication. She is not spending hours at the keys each day. She takes the summer off. Again, I appreciate you sharing this. I came because of a DIY project and stayed because of the honesty of a parenting post. ��❤️
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